Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Promise Rings

On my way in to work this morning, the radio show I was listening to read a listener email. It was from a guy, who had just gotten his gf a promise ring, and she was bugging him to get one for himself too. He was asking if anyone else had even heard of that before.
I never have. But it's an interesting thing to think about. I remember when my hubby gave me my promise ring. It felt almost like a proposal, which made it very special. Of course, the most special thing about it, is he kept the promise made by that ring. He proposed to me almost exactly 2 years later. What I don't understand is the importance that guy's gf was putting on him wearing one. The idea is that the guy is making a commitment to the girl by giving her one, right? He is saying, I promise to be faithful to you. And by accepting the ring, she is saying the same thing. Because the ring is like a reminder. So why on earth would you want the guy to have one too? And she wanted him to wear it on his left hand! I can completely sympathize with him not wanting people to think he's married!
I believe that the left hand ring finger is a special place (wow, that sounds wierd). I mean, it's the societal norm that the left hand ring finger is where you display the symbols of your lasting commitment to another person, meaning an engagement or wedding ring. When my hubby gave me my promise ring, I always wore it on my right hand. We were committed to dating only each other, but we weren't yet engaged to be married, so I didn't think that ring belonged on my left hand. Plus, as a girl, when you wear a diamond ring on that finger, all of your friends freak out, and ask you are you engaged??? And "no, it's a promise ring" seems like a disappointment to them. It's like when you are visibly pregnant, and everyone has to know all about you and your baby. You don't want to deal with that if you don't have to. A ring on the right hand is something you can show off when you want to show it off. Look!! He got me a promise ring!
So to that poor guy, whoever he is, I feel so sorry for you! Either she is so insecure that she thinks you need a reminder that you have committed to a relationship with her, or she wants to get married so bad she's not willing to wait for you to be ready. Ladies, trust me, when he's ready, he WILL let you know! And whether you see it coming or not, it will be worth the wait. Mine was. :)

6 fellow footsteps:

Barb said...

She wants the guy to have a promise ring, too?? I never heard of that either.

I remember Billy giving you the promise ring at my apartment. I also remember that he didn't SAY it was a promise ring and there was an awkward moment of silence while you tried to figure out what exactly the ring meant! LOL.

It goes down into the "Book Of Billy's Good Things" that he married you.

Mike said...

I must be really old fashioned or just not "in" with things, or maybe when I was younger it just wasn't called that. Your promise ring was the first time I had ever heard of such things. But I agree that the guy doesn't need one though. Tradition would govern that.

Anonymous said...

I would think that there is a certain age in which promise rings are no longer neccesary. If that is the case, then that guy has a crazy woman on his hands.

Barb said...

Are you home? Is that you, that other circle on the neoearth? LOL. I've been calling.

Kiyotoe said...

Well, given my recent track record over on my page, I'm hesitant to answer this question. Oh forget it...

HECK NO I'm not wearing a promise ring, ESPECIALLY on my left hand. Psshhh....fuggetaboutit.

Please don't tell anyone I said that. Don;t need anymore blog drama. That goes for you too Skit, if you're reading this. lol.

I got an image to protect.

Barb said...

pthththt lol